This is pretty rough; I fully plan on polishing it further, so gimme them rough critiques. Hope ya’ll like this hot pile of trap garbage! Enjoy 😀
Lyrics:
Ice in my lean yuh,
Ice in my veins,
Ice in my steez yuh,
Ice in my brain,
Ice in my freezer,
Icin’ my pain,
Bitch who you playin’ with,
Shit, ain’t you game? (X2)
Poppin’ them pills I’m on set,
You got a stick I got lead,
I told you I’m fucked in the head,
Step at me you already dead,
I’m fuckin’ yo bitch in my bed,
I suck on her tits she give head,
She come when I choke on her neck,
She takin’ that dick like we wed.
GET FUCKED FUCKED UP (x3)
GET FUCKED YUH
GET FUCKED FUCKED UP (x3)
GET FUCKED YUH
GET FUCKED UP (x2)
Breakdown:
Skrrra
Gra Bra Dra
Skipatidipatida
Skrubububububuda (Skrrrt)
Skrubududub
Skrubububa
Krakkakabakakaga
Grra Grra Grra Grra Brra Brra Brra
Let’s fukken’ go
Split ya head open like a cantelope,
Tie a rope around ya throat,
Drag ya ass until ya choke, uh yea bitch,
I don’t give a fuck about ya hope,
Got my head full a dope,
Doped up, woke up like I don’t even know it,
Do this shit for low, down low,
Stones throw from ya home,
Ya I’m home grown,
Growin’ grass and smokin hoes,
Blowin’ O’s tokin’ bowls,
Broken bones, I’m breaking bones,
Awoken soul I’m workin’ dull,
This dollar bill ain’t working tho
Ice in my lean yuh,
Ice in my veins,
Ice in my steez yuh,
Ice in my brain,
Ice in my freezer,
Icin’ my pain,
Bitch who you playin’ with,
Shit, ain’t you game? (X2)
Man, fuck this shit
This track goes hard. I think you could take some time mixing it and making your vocals brighter and punchier while still fitting well in the mix. The bass and kick interfere with each other, so maybe side chain them to be cleaner. Try adding effects to the background ad libs here and there to keep it interesting!
I hate this, but man if it don’t sound good man…The beat was sick, dude. Nice choice with 808. The lyrics where the shit. The kick and the bass got in the away of each other. Other than that dude. This is hip.
I like the Lyrics, Very good rapping and overall rhyme.
I would work on instrumentation, more complexity would of been great, like counter melodies.
Also clearer vocals would of been nice, maybe more compression.
Great track with great trap style. Inflections and articulation were clear. Maybe add more instrumentation and double some instruments to add weight.
Jacinto Sims II
Alright Erik! I’ll be waiting for the Now That’s what I Call Music vol. 47 release of this complete with “clean” lyrics! EQ vocals a bit, there’s some low end in there that’s interfering with kick and bass. Nice rhythmic flow though. Maybe add some synthesizer arpeggios to create some melodic interest or some sound FX to keep it fresh. Like Taylor said, sidechaining the bass to the kick drum would help those two instruments get out of each other’s way.